Revolting Body

I have spent a lot of my life trying to whip my body into shape. Dieting and exercise have been necessary evils, and injuries – especially those originating from exercise – along with a history of digestive issues and food intolerances have always seemed so unfair, like my body revolting against my best intentions.

Perhaps my body is revolting against me. Maybe I haven’t cared to listen, until the whispers have become cacophonous shouts.

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The heart sends more information to the brain than visa-versa. In fact, 80-90% of heart-brain communication originates in the heart, not the other way around.

This brings into question the idea that the brain is the primary source of communication. We often think of the brain as having executive control, when so much information is actually coming from the other direction. Perhaps the brain is not so much the pilot as we think.

Another interesting fact about the heart is that it has ganglia – cellular clusters that resemble and appear to operate much like memory cells of the brain. Our hearts may hold memory, too. Odd stories of people who have received heart-transplants inheriting recollections and cares of the donors – things that would be seemingly inconceivable except for the possible transfer of memories from donor to recipient via the heart.

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I am learning more and more about the wisdom of the body and how parts communicate with the whole. Listening takes practice, appreciation, patience, and willingness to relearn a language we may have shut out in our drive to perform or conform.

Or, perhaps we have numbed a multitude of discomforts for so long that we don’t know how to feel or listen… because we are afraid of what we might feel and learn.

I have privileged my mind and brain too long, thinking that the executive brain knows best. Ironic how it’s a thought that puts thinking in the power seat. But now I am coming to understand wholeness is as much felt as thought, and that our bodies hold wisdom and information that can help us live well in the moment – much more than I realized.

Tuning in and actually living in the body may be difficult for many of us who have lived our entire lives hating our bodies, but a shift toward healing is possible. In my quest for wholeness and well-being for myself and others, I am continuing a journey of return that started with childbirth and yoga more than 20 years ago, now through studying somatic intelligence and embodiment.

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My feet hurt like they’ve never hurt before; I’ve developed plantar fasciitis. Last year I discovered the source of my consistent back ache, a degenerative spinal condition that, while likely genetic, may get worse if I don’t keep up consistent core strength-training (which I haven’t been doing). I am heavier than I’ve ever been before, save for the 9th month of either of my pregnancies. The menopausal hot flashes are preceded by a sensation like pins and needles to the face. I don’t mean to complain, only to illustrate the cacophony I mentioned earlier.

I hear you, body. I’m ready to listen, body. I’m serious this time. I know I cannot think my way through this, trying to impose some control over what is happening to my body. Maybe instead of driving, I try riding. Listening, feeling, being.

Viva la evolution.

[here is a fun aside: I looked up the expression ¡Viva La Evolución! and came across this documentary – connected?]

uteachme2

I'm a passionate educator, rational optimist, hopeful idealist, and writing project fellow.

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