Or, How to Stop Looking for Gratitude in All the Wrong Places
One of the regular routines in my classroom was Grati-Tuesday (the name borrowed from Project Happiness). Each Tuesday, I would have students write down three good things – a brief list of events, people, objects, situations, etc. that are good in their lives, with a note about why we are grateful for / appreciate these “things.”
I would tell students, “The harder this is, the more you need it.” I absolutely, 100% believe this to be true.
Gratitude is one of the 5 keys to positive change, a keystone of wellbeing, and an antidote to our natural negativity biases. Three good things is one of several practices that can help us cultivate gratitude.
I first heard of 3 good things in 2014 via a viral TEDTalk by Jane McGonigal (2010), “The Game that Can Give You 10 Extra Years of Life”. McGonigal describes her recovery from a debilitating concussion through a game she created called SuperBetter (which I just today learned has an app!) I recommend this game to anyone; I can’t say I played it for long, but I did learn a tremendous amount about the ways we can help ourselves build resources for wellbeing, including connecting with our social network of support and counting our blessings – or practicing gratitude.
At first, three good things can feel forced and contrived – at least, that’s how it felt to me, and I share this with my students. In fact, at the depth of that depressive episode when I was trying out SuperBetter, I found it truly difficult to come up with 3 good things on some days. But over time, I noticed a shift – I counted my blessings first. I began to look for the good side in everything. I share this shift with my students, too.
Creating a practice that makes us focus on what is good in our lives helps us to reframe the negatives. Looking on the bright side is essential to creating conditions for our growth and wellbeing – for flourishing. Many students have reported to me that they continue in gratitude journals on a daily basis. Other students who have moved on – out of my class or matriculated from the school – report that they still use this practice because they found it so helpful.
I cannot say enough about the value of a gratitude practice for teacher wellbeing, either. As teachers, we may often feel isolated and under-appreciated. I know I personally was looking for other people to show gratitude for all my hard work and innovation. I wanted other people to tell me I was doing a good job, to validate the sacrifices I was making and the effort I was putting in to the work with students. I’m not saying I didn’t get any appreciation – I did! But I was looking for gratitude in the wrong places.
Feeling appreciation for what is good in my life, expressing my genuine appreciation for students to students—that is what made a difference for me.
For more on this practice and for other resources, check out the Greater Good in Action website at https://ggia.berkeley.edu/practice/three-good-things# .
For more information on wellbeing practices you can try for yourself or with your students, see this infographic (a poster I recently presented to the World Positive Education Accelerator) and other posts here on positive education.
I am grateful to YOU for reading all the way to the end of this post! If you have a gratitude practice you’d like to share, or if you have any questions, please comment.
